By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i dont even know how to be here
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM