You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize