I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
