This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
