There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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