You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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