I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
is it fun? or sober?
try to milk me bitch
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
