in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I want her autograph on my taint
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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