I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
