He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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