it's too hot outside to masturbate.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I can't turn off my feet"
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
