The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize