I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Randomize
