we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
