I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize