yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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