Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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