Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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