that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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