Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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