No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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