Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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