I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
