It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
