plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
