I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
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