What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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