I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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