We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
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