We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
