love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
