My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize