I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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