Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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