Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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