The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
