i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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