I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
