I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize