garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
