Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
