I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize