Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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