she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize
