Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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