im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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