time to smoke my breakfast
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
