great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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