you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
