ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Randomize
