Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize